Caught Beneath The Landslide

Its a week now since the horrible accident. My father is still in serious condition. He's suffering. Everytime my mom, or my grandmom started to talk to him, tears will start falling down his eyes. My father is someone who thinks a lot. All i can do is just remind him that everything will be find. Ayah tak perlu nak fikir sangat. I'm here and running the family. Mom said to me, kita kena redha and be prepared for the worst. For sekarang kita doa saja.

My health is deteriorating too. I'm almost at the end of a near cliff. Can i handle this situation? I hope so.

Here, i want to say thank you to someone that have been very helpful. Without you even noticed, u've helped a lot. And because of your talk, i can remain to be calm. Thank you, i hope u know who u are. You are indeed a good friend. And to ohers too, you all have just been so... caring. Thanks. Please continue with our prayers.

Bringing the crowd together

My dear friends...

On last monday... my parents met with an horrible accident. My dad is currently in I.C.U unit and my mom was cleared out but she still couldn't move properly.

I myself never plead in my entire life, but now... i really need your help. Please pray for my father's recovery. Only God can repay your good kindness.

For all of my friends who flood my phone with messages.. THANK YOU. I love you all. Thanks.

PLEASE!!!

Uncomfortable tales of discomfort

HANDSET HILANG!!!!!! ... tension betul. Dah lama pakai that 012 number. It has been a joyous 5 years chatting, smsing, calling and etc.

Geram, mad, sad at the same time!!!

Fix You - Coldplay

"Fix You"

when you try your best but you don’t succeed
when you get what you want but not what you need
when you feel so tired but you can’t sleep
stuck in reverse

and the tears come streaming down your face
when you lose something you can’t replace
or you love someone but it goes to waste
what could be worse?

lights will guide you home
and ignite your bones
and i will try to fix you

high up above or down below
when you’re too in love to let it go
but if you’ll never try, you’ll never know
just what you’re worth

lights will guide you home
and ignite your bones
and i will try to fix you

Tears stream down on your face
When you lose something you cannot replace

Tears stream down on your face
And I...

Tears stream down on your face
I promise you, I will learn from my mistakes

Tears stream down on your face
And I...

Lights will guide you home
And ignite your bones
And I will try to fix you.


----------------------------------------------------

Its a very nice song. And for the first time... cloudburst have done a cover on it and we're very proud of ourself. Cool song indeed.

If i could... i will certainly would... that's a promise.

Kerja gila... hehhehe

Esok - Sabtu

Hal - Cousin's convocation

Plan - Going to JB

How - By car

Departure - 6.30 a.m

Arrive - within 10.00 to 10.30

Back to KL - Around Zohor

Why? - Malam jamming

Yeayy!!!

(tak sempat jumpa some of my friends kat JB, next time - next time i'm in JB i'll give a copy of my band's CD to you all... ingatkan ye)

How i sum up my 5 month?

(---H-E-L-L---)

Have been working for 5 month now as a lecturer/instructor at Maktab Tentera Diraja Malaysia. Been working like a camel on a desert, without pay check. It seems like there is some problem with my salary process. SO!!! i have been living 4 the past 5 month relying on my savings. Dahla i have to use up all my savings... i have to go to Seremban la... then Johore... later Penang... then Terengganu, then Pahang, lepas tu Sarawak... after that Seremban again for 2 weeks in a row itupun tak kira all other expenses yang i have to keluarkan for trip all over KL. Conference laa... talks laa... seminar la... presentation laa... My cousin semua dah ckp yang aku ni macam ROBOCOP!!! Hhahahhaa. I don't even have time to go to visit my ibu angkat (my ex-lecturer), didn't have the chance to jumpa Bigg's family (well... i can say lebih kurang macam my family gak) - uncle Hatta, Auntie, and espesially bigg's lovely sister, Nadia (who always stood by me just in case if i fall). Abg bob rindu kat adik.

At first... i stayed at Khaliz's house and later occupy a new house with Bigg and Pian. We're doing ok. Smpailah i decided to move back to Khaliz's apartment sebab i couldn't afford the house rent. Bukan tak cukup, cuma to ease the flow of money from my saving. Bigg was telling me all this difficult things that he has to endure when i move back to Khaliz's apartment. So... being a nice friend (i always do this), i decided not to switch apartment. Hmm... for a friend sake.. takpe lah. Bankrupt pun bankrupt lah.

Later... after 3 weeks... bigg decided to move back to his parent's house atas desakan keluarga. I was so... pissed off. I was mad and i was sad. After what i did, he just walk out from the house. Tapi now, i'm ok with it. Takpelah.... dah mak bapak suruh. Tak baik ingkar ckp orang tua. Now... it seems like that house has lost its ummphh!! Hmm. I don't know what to do. I'm in a corner. Kesian pulak kat Pian. He's happy that i'm there. Ntahla...

Fuel is another major thing. Bila pakai wira memang terasa betul. My plan utk pakai V6 pun have to re-schedule to next year. Nak buat mcm mana. Fuel prices is insanely high. Planning to buy a big bike for a while until my financial are back stable.

But on top of that... i'm doing ok. I've endure so... many hardship while growing up. Sabar sajalah. Not to say tak bersyukur... kena bersyukur jugak. Bersyukur that i am still alive and bersyukur there's a few who still make my life a cheerful one. Thank you. I hope u know who u are. World is a better place with these great people around me.

SOUND OFF!!

Cloudburst will be back soon. New song... New Style... New Directions.

CLOUDBURST will be going WORLDWIDE.... very soon. I hope!!
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Like the naked leads the blind
I know I'm selfish I'm unkind
Sucker love I always find
Someone to bruise and leave behind

All alone in space and time
There's nothing here but what here's mine
Something borrowed something blue
Every me and every you
Every me and every you
-----------------------------------------------------------------------

Turn - Travis

I want to see what people saw
I want to feel like I felt before
I want to see the kingdom come
I want to feel forever young
I want to sing
To sing my song
I want to live in a world where I belong
I want to live
I will survive
And I believe that it won’t be very long
If we turn...
Then we might learn

So where’s the stars
Up in the sky
And what’s the moon
A big balloon
We’ll never know unless we grow
There’s so much world outside the door
I want to sing
To sing my song
I want to live in a world where I’ll be strong
I want to live
I will survive
And I believe that it won’t be very long
If we turn...
And if we turn...
Then we might learn

And if we turn...
Then we might learn
Learn to turn

Sleeping Beauty

Delusional
I believe I can cure it all for you, dear
Coax or trick or drive or
drag the demons from you
Make it right for you sleeping beauty
Truly thought
I can magically heal you

You're far beyond a visible sign of your awakening
Failing miserably to rescue

Sleeping Beauty

Drunk on ego
Truly thought I could make it right
If I kissed you one more time to
Help you face the nightmare
But you're far too poisoned for me
Such a fool to think that I can wake you from your slumber
That I could actually heal you..

Sleeping Beauty
Poisoned and hopeless
You're far beyond a visible sign of your awakening
Failing miserably to find a way to comfort you

Far beyond a visible sign of your awakening
And hiding from some poisoned memory

Poisoned and hopeless
Sleeping Beauty

Nutshell

We chase misprinted lies
We face the path of time
And yet I fight
And yet I fight
This battle all alone
No one to cry to
No place to call home

My gift of self is raped
My privacy is raked
And yet I find
And yet I find
Repeating in my head
If I can't be my own
I'd feel better dead

And you thought it was there...

And you thought it was there...
But it was not
All the time.
But you waste it all on dreams
A dream you couldn't have.
You giggle and you laugh,
Like a stupid looking horse.
Then you smile and you grin
To wipe that sorry a** of yours.
But in the end...
You're never here... you're there
You're never there... you're nowhere.

--Bobby--

All humans ever do was dreaming. You pile up a lot of crap into a big dream that you create and smile for hours for something that was not even there. I make dreams too... and i dream a lot. A dream that is almost possible to have... but a dream trully most heavenly expensive that can be cherish, if i had.

-COOL-

Weaknesses

Everybody got their own weaknesses. It is how u see them. I know mine and i strive to change. But without moral support, i don't know whether i can cope with all the sacrifice that i made. How to change when life didn't allow u to change even if your heart is fueling u to do so... hahaha

SUSAHNYAA!!!!....

Sapa ada good idea?

The Post Box

The letterhead reads
"for whom it may concern"
The back was written
In a gold thick pen.

This marks are destined
To meet the receiver
Unravel the mystic clues
Unfold the forbidden fear

The note is set
In bold black trace
Hoped to reach the new owner
And hide his fearful face.

For he could only hope
For the postman did his job
May it reach its destiny intact
May he reach his destiny in fact.

Kambing biri biri lepas kandang....

Hhahahaha... tajuk tu takde kena mengena pun. Saja je.

Anyway... just came back from camping kat Negeri Sembilan. Kena naik turun bukit. Hhahahaha... LUTUT RASA NAK TERCABUT NI. Hhahahha

(semua org disekeliling mood tak best... jgn laa mcm tu. Cheer up!!! I'll be here if anyone need me)

Finally, A robot with feelings

Hmmm... rasa mcm nak tulis tapi tak tau nak tulis apa. Hhahahahhaha... damn :(

Working like a slave. I have been working on 7 days a week for the past 2 month now. Gila kan? 3 weeks ago debate competitions judge, 2 weeks ago went to Terengganu, last week to N. Sembilan and next week again to N. Sembilan and most probably in 2 weeks time, Melaka and the week after to Penang and later Johor. GILAAA LAAAHHH!!!!...

I'm no robot.
But i seriously have to work just to kill time. Didn't have anything to hold on anymore... hahhaa... damn.

Allright folks... wish me a safe journey for all those travelling nanti.

Social nightmare

Currently at school. Baru pulang from Terengganu. Kenapa ke Terengganu? Ntah? Hhahahahha.

Hmmm... lately rasa tak best. Orang keliling pun macam tak best rasanya.

Tali

Aku,
Aku ada tali,
Tali yang panjang,
Tali yang tegang,
Buat kawal diri,
Macam layang layang.

Bila aku jatuh,
Tali menarikku,
Bila aku jauh,
tali tetap teguh.
Tali ku sayang aku,
Tali ku selalu bersamaku.

Tapi tali ku semakin reput,
Kini tak mampu menahan beratku,
Aku risau akan taliku.
Aku tak mahu tali lain, itu tali aku.

Aku pilu,
Aku bingung,
Mana tali aku?

See You

These notes are marked "return to sender"
I'll save this letter for myself
I wish you only knew
How good it is to see you
See you
see you

These steps I take don't get me anywhere
I'm getting further from myself
One thing that is always true
How good it s to see you
See you
See you
You... you... yes you

I'm done resenting you
You represented me so well
And this I promise you
How could I end up in the hands of someone else

These notes are marked "return to sender"
I'll save this letter for myself
I wish you only knew
How good it is to see you
See you
see you

Hmm....

"Untuk seketika ku hilang kawalan diri.... untuk seketika, ku hilang kawalan diri... ku hilang...."

My current addict

The Best Of You - Foo Fighters

I’ve got another confession to make
I’m your fool
Everyone’s got their chains to break
Holding you
Were you born to resist?
Or be abused?
Is someone getting the best, the best, the best, the best of you?
Or are you gone and on to someone new?

I needed somewhere to hang my head
Without your noose
You gave me something that I didn’t have
But had no use
I was too weak to give in
Too strong to lose
My heart is under arrest again
But I’ll break loose
My head is giving me life or death
But I can’t choose
I swear I’ll never give in but
I refuse
Is someone getting the best, the best, the best, the best of you?

Has someone taken your faith?
It’s real, the pain you feel
Your trust?
You must confess
Is someone getting the best, the best, the best, the best of you?

Has someone taken your faith?
It’s real, the pain you feel
The life, the love you’d die to heal

The hope that starts the broken heart
Your trust?
You must confess
Is someone getting the best, the best, the best, the best of you?
I’ve got a another confession, my friend
I’m no fool
I’m getting tired of starting again
somewhere new

Were you born to resist or be abused?
I swear I’ll never give in - I refuse
Is someone getting the best of you?


Foo Fighters have released their fifth album up to date. And its a treat for all grunge fans. Long live rock n' roll. Foo Fighters - In Your Honor, in stores now!!!

((...@..~:( * ):~..@...))

I'm in pain so much, suffering from this serious migraine. God, help me get through this for You're the only One that can give me strengh to fight this. HambaMu tak mampu.

Maybe the fact that i'm thingking too much about life, someone, work, family and friends. Hahhahaa, for the time being, i can only laugh my way out :)